I’ll do what I want when I want!

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I'll take what I want when I want!

This is me doing what I do best; doing whatever the hell I want. Sure it annoys Sofia when I lick her can of Diet Coke, but hey, I like the cold water that condenses on it. She seems to think that having three bowls of water laid out all over the house should be enough, but it isn’t. Those bowls have stagnant and lukewarm water. She claims to change the water at least once a day, but I don’t believe her. So, I take the opportunity to lick her soda cans and glasses of juice whenever I can. The water somehow tastes better. What’s she going to do? Stop drinking her precious Diet Coke? Not likely. She downs that stuff several times a day. I swear to you now, I will continue to lick the can until she gives it up! (she never will, so I’ll have my cold condensated water forever!)

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You bathe me and expect love?

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You bathe me and expect love?

Like all felines, I prefer to be clean. That said, as a Sphynx, I don’t have hair which ordinarily spreads the oils over my skin. So, what I’m getting at is that the oils on my skin attract dirt and grime. I get dirty, plain and simple. But, while I have been given regular baths since I was born, that doesn’t mean I like them. I’m a cat. We don’t do water. After I get my bath, I feel nice and clean, but I am NOT about to be all lovey over the ordeal. See that photo? That’s me giving Sofia my best ‘I will love you when I’m good and ready because you stuck me in a tub of water and degreased me with a special shampoo’ look. Okay, sure, it’s really great to be sparkly clean and sweet smelling, but I can’t let her know that. What sort of cat would I be if Sofia actually thought I was thankful? Yeah, that’s not going to happen.

I love Grumpy Cat!

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Monty looking upUs cats support one another since one day we will take over the world and will need all the help we can get, so when I saw a photo of a sweet little cat nicknamed Grumpy Cat on my writer-slave Sofia’s computer, I fell in love. Who couldn’t love a cat who tells the human world to take a hike? Sofia got up to go somewhere and left her computer, so I got the website that tells all about Grumpy Cat. I’m in love. (http://www.grumpycats.com/)

Finally, it’s warming up!

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Finally, it's warming up!

It’s been a very cold winter and my mom, me and my brother are forced to sit in front of these space heaters for warmth. Oh, sure, Sofia the writer of the family, provides us with blankets and a heated cat bed-but seriously, we deserve it, it’s not like she should be put up for a humanitarian award just because she’s doing what any human should do-we still need the heaters. It’s sunny and warm today, so the heaters are off and I’m basking in the sun. I still enjoy climbing all over Sofia, just to remind her that I’m still in charge.

Drinking from the sink

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Drinking from the sink

I don’t see what the big deal is. My brother and I prefer drinking fresh water from the sink. I showed him how to do it and I’m quite proud of that fact. Sofia, however, thinks it’s ‘annoying’ and ‘funny’ when we push her out of the way so we can get there. But, come on, we’re cats. Cats, as every human should know, get preferential treatment above all other beings on the planet. Maybe the universe…jury’s still out on that. So, I will continue to demand fresh tap water whenever I please. Learn to live with it, humans!

A Smart Car in the Family

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So Sofia went out and bought a tiny yellow car. A Smart Car she calls it. I saw it from the window. She’s very happy about it, and went on and on about how it has plenty of room inside for her to sit and write on her laptop. That’s nice, but why didn’t she tell me she couldn’t wait to take me for a ride? I like riding in the car. I meow, of course, but it’s only because I’m enjoying myself. Then I sit down and look out the window. Maybe if I meow and cry at the door, she’ll realize I want a ride. I can be annoying, when properly motivated.

She’s not done with the queries!

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When Sofia said she was finished with querying her romance novel, I thought she meant forever. Nope. She apparently meant for the week. She’s back at it again. Would somebody just take her as a client so don’t have to listen to her continuously saying how great such-and-such an agent would be? Honestly, I’m a little sick of it all. If I had thumbs, I’d write my own novel about how a crazy writer lady tortured her Sphnxi by ignoring them. Hey, we need attention at least 100 times a day. Is that too much to ask?

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